Monty’s Afterword

Here’s a pic of me at CES 2008.

Not bad, eh? More on me later.

This year’s CES was distorted by Gizmodo’s Punk’d prank that I refuse to link to. They’ve got enough web traffic for their efforts as it is. I’m not going on a rant about journalism practices or viral video or yada-yada-yada. Instead, I’d like to remind people that we’ve all been there before, but perhaps Gizmodo has struck a new chord– the rise of adolescent technology. Let’s face it. Someone has got to play the role. And, they’re not the only ones screaming for attention, needing affirmation from the peers, and in the process trying to find their self-identity. Case in point, Sony’s Rolly. What the heck was that?!

Hey, look at me. I roll around and play music. I’m crazy. I’m different. I’m cool. Right?

Everybody is looking to find their place on the show room floor. That’s CES. Big stakes. Big risks. Nasty spills. But you don’t really know CES until you’ve done it my way.

The day before my journey to CES I had to see the doctor about a swollen jaw. I turned out to be a swollen lymph node. I was prescribed generic antibiotics and steroids. The pharmacist consulted me on the steroids saying that it would make me feel a little off. “Wait. Off? What do you mean off, cause I’m heading to CES,” I said. I had to think about this. I didn’t want to go on some sort of roid rage at CES. You know it can happen, even without the roids.

“Oh. No. You’ll get a sense of euphoria.”

I thought about that for a second. Euphoria–that actually sounded good. And it was. I spent CES legally doped-up on steroids and generously claimed to be the only journalist on performance enhancing drugs. Although, it was clear to me that my performance was not at all enhanced. In fact, at an evening press event I clumsily fell into a PR’s lap and started chatting away like we were BFFs in the most embarrassing of ways. I know, it’s hard to imagine. But, it’s amazing how quickly we can make fools of ourselves when we forget who we are, either by way of prescribed performance enhancing drugs or the temptation of prescribed viral video.

One thing is for sure– there is no cure for stupidity. So long as their is a stage big enough, stupidity will continue to breed. What will be next year’s Rolly? If anything, CES ‘08 taught me that there is an audience for adolescent technology. What happens in Vegas won’t stay in Vegas. It’s gossip fodder and totally punishable– just like any good junior high prank.